Oooooh geez. I guess I have another pretty good reason to come into work everyday. One piece of really cute eye candy to indulge in. He has one of those baby faces and dark, innocent eyes. And he has such a sweet smile. Though we haven't really said much to each other besides hello, goodbye, and "here's a message for Bob." I know that he's going to school, I'm not sure how old he is, but he looks young. And I know that he doesn't come on Tuesdays and Thursdays. And that's pretty much all I need to know. For now.

So I'm having surgery on my knee on Monday. I had my pre-op this morning. You know, where they take your blood pressure and look at you to make sure you're not going to flip out when they pump you full of anesthesia. I'm not that nervous about the sugery, since they've done thousands of ACL repairs before, I'm just worried about the recovery after surgery. I haven't ever had an injury this big before in my adult life. I broke my jaw when I was 9, but everything in my memory is fuzzy, like a dream missing a few major details. Other than that, I'm just worried about getting to, from, and around at work. And no martial arts for at least a month. I guess everything else will take care of itself. Oy. Good thoughts my way appreciated.

I was wondering what everyone's opinion was on all the pictures I've been posting. Does it make my blog too busy? Or does it make it more interesting? I like them because I see them everytime I look at my blog, but I was just wondering what you thought. I suppose that's it for now. Later gator.

Reflection 101



The've given me a project at work that is supposed to give me a feeling of importance in my simple little clerical position. They want me to learn a marketing research program and then teach it to the staff. On one hand it's kinda cool because it actually gives me something to do all day. On the other, I really couldn't give a crap. This isn't what I want to end up doing with my life. I hope it's only a stepping stone to help me get to where I want to be.

Today while I was waiting for the program to load, I had ample time to browse the internet. During this 2 hours stint, I acutally took the time to go through my blog archives. My blog is over two years old!!! Reading my archives brought something very profound to my attention: I have changed. I read entries where I was happy. I read entries where I was angry. I read entries where I was immature. I read entries where I was too mature for my own good. And OH THOSE SILLY LITTLE CRUSHES! I was embarrassed about a couple of them.

It's funny how time works. I'm glad I've kept this blog. I didn't realize how journal-like it would become. I'm at a distinct crossroad in my life at this point, and I'm trying to make these huge decisions that could affect the rest of my life. Kind of like that feeling after high school, whether you should pursue more school or hit the real world running. Except, my choices are a bit more slim as far as school goes. I'm burnt out on school. And this decision is pretty scary. How do I know what I'm going to do will be right?

Do I miss the girl I once was? Perhaps. It's undeniable that she had some fun times along the way intermixed with her own tiny versions of tragedy. At the same time, in the next two years, I have no idea what will happen. Will I still be at this crummy financial firm with its office gossip and sad insurance salesmen? Possibly. I know that I will have more silly crushes, which will again be hilarious in their own ways. I also know tragedy will come, and so will heartache. But it's ok. Times have not been gentle to me as of late. But I'm ok. And I'll be ok. Roberto was surely right when he told me not to be ashamed of living. So I guess, now I know, I'll appreciate every single entry.

So...I'm a bit tipsy right now, and more than likely should not have driven home, but I'm safe and sound. This picture is from my trip to Cali but I thought I would share it with everyone because it's freakin HILARIOUS. The story behind it: we were all drunk and packing to go home after the tournament in California. All of our luggage was out on the street, so my friend Chris decides to hop in the trunk. It was great. That was before he made a mad dash to go puke...



Ah yes, I love going through the pictures on my computer late at night. I can laugh out loud if I want. It also lets me reflect on the good memories I have made and makes me look forward to other ones. I don't know where I will be in any remote future of mine, but I'll have pictures. Pictures to remind me of the people who have, if only for a minute, affected my life enough for me to want to remember them. Even if they aren't at their finest at that particular moment.

OK, that's enough deepness. Stupid wine. Enjoy.